I just had my first McDonalds' Chocolate sundae in several years. There was that yummy feeling when I was spooning the chilled McLardy goodness into my mouth.. it's been about ten minutes since my last spoonful. There's this strangely phlegmy substance that's icky sweet now lingering at the back of my throat. The words light-headed and nauseated come to mind. I'm spinning out, I sweat it. Just a little. My eyes are focusing funny I kid you not. Fuck. I so wish I was kidding. This might be the universes way of saying -

"McLard is evil and I will have your stomach vilify your mind every time you have anything from its evil depths".

I'm going to go lie on my side in the recovery position with a towel by my mouth, so I don't drown myself in my McLardy sundae vomit and the carpet won't stain.

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